Episode 146

E146 | BJJ Guest Etiquette: The Ultimate Guide to Visiting New Gyms

Published on: 12th April, 2026

In this episode of Tapped In, David Figueroa Martinez breaks down the essential "unwritten rules" of being a respectful and mindful guest at a new Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu academy. Moving away from the "old school" mentality of intentional submission for rapport, David offers a modern, professional framework for contacting gyms, managing intensity, and representing your home association with class.

3 Key Takeaways

  • Prioritize Communication: Always contact a gym at least a week in advance via social media or phone to discuss their specific uniform policies, drop-in fees, and schedule.
  • The "Guest" Mindset: Approach every roll with a defensive, observant, and controlled intensity. Your goal is to learn and be a great training partner, not to "prove" your rank or dominate the mat.
  • Professionalism is Your Uniform: Beyond just a clean Gi, being a good guest means showing up early, paying fees without being asked, and refraining from "side-coaching" or correcting the local instructors.

Chapters & Timestamps

  • 00:00 – Introduction and the "Old School" vs. Modern Approach
  • 01:54 – Pre-Visit Checklist: Contacting the Gym & Uniform Policy
  • 04:09 – Logistics: Arrival Times, Waivers, and Drop-in Fees
  • 06:21 – Researching the School's Style (Gi vs. No-Gi focus)
  • 07:44 – Being a Representative of Your Home Academy
  • 09:25 – Calibrating Intensity: The Guest Mentality
  • 11:51 – Rolling Etiquette: Why Defense is Your Best Friend
  • 13:58 – The Golden Rule: Do Not Coach the Locals
  • 16:21 – Post-Session Gratitude: Reviews and Follow-ups
  • 18:18 – The Value of Diverse Perspectives

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Transcript

Full Episode Transcript

00:00 Welcome to Tapped In. My name is David Figuero Martinez of DFM Coaching and today we're going to be discussing how to visit a gym the correct way. I recently came across this video and it was of an old school gentleman...

01:00 I want you to play. I want you to do the things that you're supposed to be doing but be a good host or be a good guest and allow for things to happen and understand that our culture might be different than your culture...

02:30 Contact the gym... I had an issue where I was going up to out of town and I had contacted two gyms and neither one of them got back to me. So I didn't go.

04:00 Generally speaking most places will... they like having someone in. It's a different pace, it's a different type of training partner... When that happens I also ask what is your uniform policy?

06:00 Always get that feedback. Ask if you need to show up or how early you should show up. You're going to probably more than likely... have to sign a waiver and fill out paperwork...

08:00 Make sure that you find out what the drop-in fee is... I've seen some places ridiculously high. And if you're not ready you show up... you're kind of asked out.

10:00 I'm a Gracie Humaita black belt... I've been a black belt for X amount of years. I'll be in town for business... that way all the information is there.

12:00 Show up 10, 15 minutes early. Show up clean. Nice clean Gi. You are making an introduction... you are now a representative of that association.

14:00 Set your mindset correctly... When you go as a guest you need to go with a guest mentality. You need to understand that you're going there to learn, have a little bit of fun, you're not looking to dominate or prove anything.

16:00 Anytime I'm rolling with anyone new in general, I play very defensive... I play simply to not get hurt and then not get submitted.

18:00 Do not coach. It's different if someone asks you something... Don't step on any toes. Don't correct the other students around you, it's not your job.

20:00 After, send a thank you. A short message of appreciation... Write a review... I mention "Hey I was in town visiting and they were gracious with me, they were hospitable..."

22:00 Take notes. You're going to be learning something that's a little different than what you're learning at home... Getting these different feedbacks is a big plus.

23:25 If you have any questions on this or anything else just related, please hit me up. DFM.209. Until next time, thank you so much.

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About the Podcast

Tapped In: A JiuJitsu Podcast
A Bjj/Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Podcast By DFM Coaching
I am a dedicated practitioner and coach on a mission to help you navigate the complex, rewarding world of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Whether you are a White Belt trying to survive your first stripe or a seasoned grappler looking for a competitive edge, I created this show to be your technical and mental mat-side companion.

In every episode of Tapped In, I break down the nuances of submission grappling. I dive deep into the Jiu-Jitsu lifestyle, discussing how to overcome mat burnout, manage BJJ injuries, and develop the "black belt mindset" both on and off the mats.

Why Listen to Me?
Beyond my fifteen years on the mats, I’ve had the honor of sharing my philosophy as a recurring guest on BJJ Mental Models and Fighting Matters. I believe in a structured tactical approach and I bring that same level of high-level conceptual analysis to every episode of this show.

The Training Schedule:
I know your time is valuable. That’s why I release three new episodes every week, each designed to fit perfectly into your daily routine. With a runtime of 14–24 minutes, these episodes are built to give you tactical clarity in the time it takes to drive to the academy or finish a warm-up.

If you live for the grind, the flow, and the constant pursuit of the tap, this podcast is for you. Subscribe and let's level up your game, one episode at a time.

About your host

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David Figueroa-Martinez

I’m David Figueroa-Martinez, Jiu-Jitsu black belt, mindset coach, and founder of Tapped In. This podcast isn’t for hype or highlight reels. It’s for grapplers who train with purpose.

I teach structure, not chaos. Mindset, not ego. Progress, not performance.

Through each episode, I share grounded lessons from the mats, the mind, and the moments that shape who we become, as athletes, as leaders, and as people.

I also run DFM Coaching, where I help White and Blue Belts build clarity and structure through personalized systems, and write Choke Point Chronicles, a weekly series diving deep into strategy, growth, and culture in Jiu-Jitsu.

Whether you’re a White Belt looking for direction or a black belt trying to stay sharp without selling your soul, this is where we train the inner game.